Wednesday, 2 May 2012

You have mail!

As I open the inbox to my emails and sift through the spam, rubbish, cons and my pet hate – chain mail, I come across another Madeleine McCann appeal. Asking me to share with my friends yet another updated image of her and yet another heartfelt plea from the parents I hesitated deleting..

This is a truly sad event that I struggle emotionally with, especially being a parent myself. I want to be able to empathise with the McCanns at their loss and torment but I cannot understand how you can leave your small children unattended in a foreign place whilst you socialise…?? It's a bit like letting your dog off the lead and then acting all shocked when it runs off!

I've never truly connected with the parents when watching them in interviews (and I am not for one minute accusing them of anything). I’m sure as a parent the fearful thought (I have recurring nightmares) of losing your child has swept across you that takes your breath and inflicts a pain in the heart of shear panic. I personally think I would need to be sedated in their situation but the interviews always seem so cold…or is it that I am sick of the press praising them for their strength, or is it just me expecting more from them, some sort of remorse or shame or just anything that spells out we were wrong for what we did but our daughter doesn’t deserve to suffer for it?

Anyone who knows me and has been in my home have often found themselves locked in (no joke). I lock my front door whilst I am still in the house to not only prevent my Houdini 3yr old from escaping (and she can run fast for a wee tot believe me) but to also stop people from just walking in. If I was to pop across the road to my friends house (and this is literally 15-20 footsteps away) and leave my children alone I would be reported to social services and perhaps even find myself in trouble with the law….wouldn’t I? I would be classed as a bad parent….wouldn’t I?

On the other hand I can’t stand to think of this little girl still alive growing up away from her family, scared and upset and going through god knows what day in day out for 5 years now. I am unsure whether I want her to be still alive and reunited with her family and undergo a lifetime of serious therapy or if I prefer to believe she is a beautiful angel and no longer suffering with these cruel people who felt it acceptable to snatch her from her happy life.

All I know is that this is a lesson (even if we didn’t need it) to remind ourselves of the saying as parents we need to ‘have eyes in the back of our heads’ when it comes to our children!

Madeleine McCann
Madeleine McCann when she disappeared and how she might look now